I Am A Griever
Mourning a Man I Never Knew
This spring, I turned fifty-four. I have now outlived the father I never knew: my biological father. It’s been almost twenty-three years since we spoke; eighteen years since I learned of his death. I’m still dealing with the strange grief of his loss.
Nicole – Power of Speaking About Lost Ones
Nicole discusses the importance of sharing memories of those lost to drug poisoning and speaking their names.
Jim – Significant incidents
Jim discusses being involved in a significant incident and how it’s normal to feel overwhelmed and ruminate over it. You may even start to drink or use drugs to cope. But it’s important to remember that you’re not alone. Many police officers have been through similar experiences. And there are resources available to help you get through this.One of the best things you can do is talk to a trusted friend or colleague. They can offer support and understanding. You can also seek professional help from a therapist or counselor. They can help you to process your experience and develop healthy coping mechanisms. It’s also important to remember that you can’t change the past. But you can learn from it. And you can move on. Don’t let one incident define you. You are a strong and capable person. And you will get through this.
Joyce – Mothers supporting mothers in grief
Joyce talks about the value of a support network of other mothers who have lost
Joyce -The pandemics impact on drug poisonings
Joyce talks about drug poisonings during the pandemic
Lyss – Responsibilities
Lyss talks about her mother’s death, being the eldest and how it has effected the way she feels about responsibilities
Jim – Police culture and grief
Jim talks about how grief is a natural part of life, but it can be especially difficult to deal with when you’re in the police culture. There’s a lot of pressure to bottle up your emotions and not show weakness, but that’s not healthy. It’s important to find healthy ways to cope with your grief, whether it’s talking to a therapist, joining a support group, or simply spending time with loved ones. You’re not alone, and there are people who care about you and want to help.
A Million Other Things: Grieving a Drug Poisoning Death
Sister, father, son, niece, best friend – some of these words might be how you would describe your loved one who has died of an overdose or drug poisoning. People Who Use Drugs (PWUD) are not defined by their substance use – they are a million other things to those who love and miss them dearly. Drug poisoning and overdose deaths are stigmatized in our society. The focus is on how the person died, not who they are. Society still holds onto old notions and beliefs about drugs which come with a value judgment about people who use drugs, which further contributes to stigma. Not everyone who uses drugs is an addict and not all drug use is inherently problematic. People who use drugs deserve dignity and respect when we are remembering and honouring those who have died by overdose or drug poisoning.
Keeping Records
I pulled the photos out of their envelope one at a time, turning over each one to carefully record the date, place, and people in the photo. Sometimes, I included comments. “Apple picking in Hamilton with Pop Pop, Fall, 2023. You loved the wagon ride!”. I slipped each picture into an empty pocket in my son’s photo album.