Blog Post

You Can’t Always Get What You Want

“Happiness is a choice.” A friend of mine posted this quote on Facebook the other day. She then asked others what that quote meant to them. The responses were interesting and expected, and some were even inspiring. It’s so easy to say “I choose to be happy” when life is going well. On the other…

Left Out: Enfranchising Children’s Grief and Loss

By: Jessica Milette, MSW, RSW All human beings have the capacity to grieve: people with intellectual disabilities, those living with a traumatic brain injury, and children of all ages. However, many people can experience disenfranchised grief when someone dies. Disenfranchised grief is generally grief that is not usually openly acknowledged, socially accepted or publicly mourned.…

Grief is Not the Enemy

Mary E. Schulz is a Social Worker and writer who loves dogs, opera and stories that take her breath away. When I was younger, before anyone close to me had died, I thought that grief was something to be beaten. Conquered. Overcome. That grief is the enemy. I would hear people say things like, “She…

Beauty found at the edges: a portrait of community support

I’d sent a text saying “Hello friends, I’m putting out a call for flowers. I went to public school with Kory, the young man who died in downtown Cobourg this week, and though I hadn’t seen him in recent years, I feel the loss of him on a community level, as I imagine you do, too. Some of Kory’s people are gathering tonight in vigil at the bank where he died, and I’m gathering flowers from those of us who have gardens to share with this grieving community. Do you have some blooms in your garden that you’d be willing to share?”

Making Space to Hear Them: supporting children in grief

Children tend to be naturally curious as they grow and learn to navigate the world. As adults, it’s our job to walk with them through that process of learning and to support their curiosity. It can be hard to do that with respect when we are situated in cultures that don’t acknowledge children as autonomous humans worthy of mutual respect. It can be tempting to encourage kids to ignore their feelings about death and grief or to shut down conversations about it when they ask questions. Sometimes, this is because we just don’t know what to say that is developmentally appropriate, especially with young children. Sometimes, it’s because we haven’t allowed ourselves to develop our own thoughts and feelings about death and grief and it feels uncomfortable for us to talk about.

Ripples of Grief: Supporting Ourselves, Others, and our Communities After a Death

By Jessica Milette, MSW, RSW When death knocks on the door of a community, each of us are impacted. Sometimes a death will touch many lives across a community, whether people knew the deceased personally or not. We may grieve the death of a family member, friend, or acquaintance, a well-known community member, or someone…

Grief & Drug Poisoning Toolkit [Free Downloadable PDF]

  Navigating life, death, and loss can be overwhelming. This toolkit is designed by mental health professionals and contains information about grief, different types of grief we may experience, gentle reminders on how to move through grief, as well as tips for those who may be supporting someone in their life who is grieving. This…

Grief, Breastfeeding, and Care

In this essay, I share a bit about my story of grief and breastfeeding. I also share some thoughts about the cultural grief some people are carrying about the lack of support afforded to lactating families whose goal it is to feed their baby from their body. I use some gendered language throughout this essay…

Learning from Grief

Grief is weird. Odd start, I know, but that was the sentence I used a lot whenever someone asked me how I was. It was never a constant feeling; it changed day to day. And still does. It’s the full gambit of emotions from sadness to anger to guilt and, though dark, even humour found its way in.

The ties that bind; grieving the loss of a sibling

When my three brothers and I were growing up and the proverbial hit the fan, Mum would often say, in a bid to keep her brood calm, ‘Well, at least we are all still here.’ She reminded me of this affectionate saying only very recently. I can still recall how I felt as a child…

Saved by a Unicorn: How I Found the Positive in Grief, One Stitch at a Time

Looking back, I had no idea how to even continue to live. A simple attempt at something therapeutic sent the negative bereavement energy into a positive direction. It made me realize my strengths, at a time when I felt I had none at all. It provided a space where I am now better able to manage grief when it hits.

Tips for Grieving During the Holidays

The holidays can bring up a lot of feelings, especially when you’re grieving the loss of a loved one. Whether it’s the first holiday season without someone, the holidays mark a time where someone you love died, or it’s just hard to be around celebration when you’re not feeling celebratory, December can feel heavy.

These are a few tips for grieving during the holidays.